Visa Vortex

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Marcelle says:


At my leavers speech the lovely Colin described me as a STRONG WOMAN. So, today I thought I’d put that to the test by trying to get four tourist single entry visas for 12 days in Russia.


So I left school at 8am and arrived at the embassy an hour later, traffic in BKK lived up to its reputation!


The building is cold, austere, cramped and lacking in information and comforts. I was not perturbed; I can do ‘basic‘ I am strong.


The conversation started off well to test my strength!
Embassy Man: “You have NO chance of visa, this form you give me is a joke”


Me: (This will put my skill to the test! Lots of smiling, apologising  and smiling and offering to fill in the forms some more smiling and lots of chat about how excited we all are about our trip and smiling.)


Embassy Man: Show me flight tickets.
Me: (Explained our crazy trip.)
Embassy Man: Show me train tickets then.
Me: We collect them in Bejing, I have all the documents here, I’m sure we are not the first to do this (fingers crossed in my pocket. smile smile, smile.)
Embassy Man: Alright (was that a smile? it was I am sure it was. YES!)


After 45 minutes of signing forms to show that None of my family has done military service, been involved in or been near political riots,(Red shirts are long forgotten) that we have no skills in explosive manufacturing, nuclear bombs, and chemical warfare I submitted the forms again. (I left out Harry’s potion skills that can zap you to Mars using the right mixture of shampoo, toothpaste and peppercorns...)


At this stage I’ll be honest, there was an enormous boulder in my belly. My hands appeared to be shaking and my head was spinning. It was the staff party last night and I decided I’d enjoyed myself too much. I AM strong, Colin said so.


I told my story to another person in the queue who agreed I should keep the anguish from Matt who would have spontaneously combusted under the pressure.


Three lovely Russian ladies wished me luck, with a worryingly clear look of sympathy in their eyes.


I was doing ok, I told myself I could do this!


The man returned to say that I had ticked the wrong box. Our passports are tourist passports NOT ‘official’ passports . Did YOU know that? I always thought passports were official.


Me: “Oh thank-you sir I had no idea, I learn new things every day and I will never forget this, thank-you”


Back to the queue


A scary lady with very dark hair severe eye make up and harsh dark rimmed glasses took my passports while Embassy Man went for his Coffee World break (NO facilities for customers, the toilet was directly connected to the waiting room and all sounds from inside were shared with the group waiting outside...)


Passport 1 Check (internal sigh of relief)
Passport 2 Check (way-hey, whoop whoop I'm in the clear, yippeeeee!)
Passport 3 Why does the woman keep looking from one page to the other again and again? Oh no, she got up and left the room. My strong heart sank.


I decided she’s gone for her Coffee World drink, calm deep breathing Colin said I was strong, I can do this....


Scary Woman: Your passport number is WRONG for boy child. (internal screaming/wailing/chest beating)


Me: Well it must be from his old passport, Harry has just got a new one. (Smile) His passport is here, we can update it now.


Scary Woman: NYET (Now I don’t speak Russian but that word I can work out. Arghhhh!)


Embassy Man returns 12 minutes before closing at 12pm.  I have options...


I paid for Matt, Maisie and myself to have a visa which will be ready next Thursday. Harry may get one in a day, at extortionate cost, or perhaps next Friday. The day we leave.


I got home, and Harry announced he would rather fly!!!!!


Would anyone flying to the UK from BKK like a companion, GSOH, likes Iron Man, and will watch Cartoon Network for the entire duration of the 11 hour flight....


75% sorted, remained externally calm. Mai Pen Rai, ka. Thank-you Thailand.


To be continued.....

2 comments:

Emma Goligher said...

Any sign of the little one's visa??? What fun...!

Colbo said...

You see where you went wrong was in having the Marcelle Thatcher photo in your passport. The Not For Turning Iron Lady is ideal for inner strength but not such a good thing for getting a visa from the arch nemesis.

Hope it all goes well,

Love being cited in your blog. So modern.

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